One Of The Best Experiences Of My Life!

I haven't told this story before, but a few years back (before China attacked us with their genetically engineered WuFlu) I was walking down the sidewalk in downtown Cypress. Suddenly an unmarked van pulled up beside me and a half dozen large male j!gs jumped out. Before I knew it one of them threw a bag over my head and hustled me into the back of the van.

Awhile later I awoke (I must have blacked out) and I found myself in what looked like an abandoned factory. For the next few days each of the hulking j!gs had their way with me (sexu@lly). My @nus and throat hurt so much after hours and hours of sexu@l abuse at the hands of my tormentors. For weeks after I couldn't poop or eat without soreness. Yet I'd say it was totally worth it.

Which isn't to say I didn't call the police. But the cops (for some reason) didn't believe me. Just because the j!gs forced me to scarf a bunch of shrooms and smoke a ton of pot. According to the police I suffered a "drug induced delusion".

Below is a drawing of one of my attackers. I described what the j!g looked like to a police sketch artist and this is what the person drew. That was prior to them kicking me out of the police station. I grabbed the drawing as a very rude officer grabbed my arm and forced me to leave. "You're lucky I'm too busy at the time to charge you with filing a false police report" Officer @sswipe remarked as he shoved me toward the door.

From time to time I will take out this pic and use it to w@ck off. Good memories. Excepting that rude officer. I should have pressed charges against him! I think he might have been an anti-asian racist.



Note: I originally published this post on my blog at the URL iheartwhitegravy.blogspot.com, but that blog got taken down after Assface falsely reported it for a bogus T0S infraction. Luckily I had it backed up and can therefore republish it here, on my new blog. I changed the date to match the date I originally published it at my Wh!te Gr@vy blog.